When Somebodyisfromhere.com Ranks the Cities he Would Move to Based Entirely on NFL Teams.

Somebodyisfromhere.com likes the NFL and Corona. They both lay the groundwork and provide for any possible excuse that may be required for the following.

Nevertheless, here are the NFL cities Somebodyisfromhere.com would move to if he had to base his decision entirely on where he wanted to watch football. He lives near Philadelphia – and is an Eagles fan – so he won’t count that city. Also, based on that, it should go without saying that he admits totally to a bias because of it. Other NFC East teams will not be high on the list.

1. Buffalo - You didn’t see that coming right? Have you ever read old sports books, maybe about the Negro leagues or whatever, and they name cities like Bismark as towns that everybody traveled to and played sports? They were industrial and kind of don’t exist anymore. Well, Somebodyisfromhere.com has read some of these books and he finds it absolutely charming that one of these cities still exists. He will forgive the fact that they play in Toronto now and again.

Other sports have the small town teams. In basketball, Portland, Sacramento, and Oklahoma City come to mind. Those cities all have a sort of logic though. They are newish. Besides, the NBA seems wishy washy on Sacramento. Buffalo even has hockey, but watching outdoor football in snow in a somewhat boring looking stadium is something Somebodyisfromhere.com could totally get behind.

2. Baltimore – The Ravens are a team that should not have an identity. There are teams that have been around for much longer and can’t even win a playoff game, but year in and year out you know these guys are going to be fine on one side of the ball.

The city will always be the town in the movie Diner where a guy had to quiz his future wife on football facts (Baltimore Colts) before marrying her. If you drive around Maryland or DC on game day you will see crazies every bit as passionate as the other North Eastern cities, but with a little more appreciation and slightly less entitlement.

3. Chicago – Solider Field and Saturday Night Live accents. The food promises to be good and the beers will probably make you feel warmer sooner or later.

4. Green Bay – It’s the cliche choice, but it’s the cliche choice for a reason. It’s another town that is cold as hell, but the small town feel seems intimate. The stadium seems historic.

Somebodyisfromhere.com wants to go to the cities that are the clear cradle of their particular sport. For example, he’s been to Yankee Stadium. He wants to watch hockey in Montreal. Picking the city for each sport is harder than one would think. It’s a combo of stadium and history. Green Bay probably has to be the NFL, though.

5. Kansas City – Arrowhead seems cool. It even has a cool name. People of Missouri know how to party.

In baseball and basketball, you know where the cities are that are passionate. Passion, in this case, means the potential to get rowdy. Football isn’t really like this. It’s not just the Northeast. Does anybody doubt that people in Chicago, Oakland, or Kansas City can throw down?

6. San Francisco – Somebodyisfromher.com grew up watching the 49ers powerhouses. That had to have left a positive impression. Now, he sort of just remembers fondly watching football being played on a baseball field. That seems incredibly annoying as a player and might not be much better for the real fan, but from afar it always just said San Fran.

7. New York Jets – They are green and they are not the Giants. That has got to count for something.

8. Miami - Somebodyisfromhere.com watched Hard Knocks and practicing in front of palm trees just seems to make sense. It’s probably because he’s gone to baseball spring training a few years in a row. They lose points however when Willie Beamen would basically rate as their best quarterback in 20 years.

9. Pittsburgh - Another team and city with an identity. It would be front running to move there though. Take comfort, however, Bane would put it lower on his list.

10. Oakland - The team seems to have a cool identity what with the whole Raider vibe. Somebodyisfromhere.com’s guilty pleasure is fast receivers (and/or fast cornerbacks). Still, you fools have to pick a city already.

Received consideration: New England - Somebodyisfromhere.com likes the region but hates Bill Belichick. It’s counter intuitive really as Somebodyisfromhere.com wears hoodies every chance he gets. Also, he doesn’t really get what/where Foxboro is.

Somebodyisfromhere.com could have ranked all of the cities, but it meant he would have to say complimentary things about domes…or Jerry Jones. It’s probably best to stop here. Otherwise, he might get into the hurting feelings business.

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